Are We Secular?

An important question that Bharat Uday Mission needs to ask.

I was at the BM National Convention last weekend. The Convention itself was not what I would call entirely successful but we did end up making and agreeing on some important decisions about the organizational structure. But this questions remains unanswered.
So, are we secular?

I was having a talk with one of my friends the other day when he innocently asked me, “What does secularism mean?” I answered without the slightest hint of what I was getting myself into,” It means not discriminating on the basis of religion”. He then said,” If that is the case, then India was never a secular nation until the Muslims invaded. Before them there was only one religion. So in other words Muslim invaders gave us secularism”. I laughed. But a little later I was left wondering about this question he had raised. There were two questions lingering in my mind. One, What does secularism truly mean? Two, is it just discrimination on the basis of religion or is there something more to it?
The former took me to the latter question and the latter took me to a more profound one of what is religion? To define discrimination on the basis of religion we need to define religion!!!
Religion is a very philosophical topic and to answer that question has been the life’s ambition of many wise men. Are religion and faith the same thing? Or are Hinduism, Islam, Christianity, Sikhism, etc. the only religions? What about other things which are also a matter of faith, like casteism? Is each caste in itself a religion? After all even two different castes have different customs and rules. So is discrimination on the basis of caste also non-secular.? I did not attempt to dig any further into this. However I did form a vague opinion that being secular is to not discriminate between two people or groups of people based on
1)religion,
2)caste,
3)or other such faith-based things.

So was India always secular? Prior to the Muslim invasion the whole nation possibly practiced the same religion,’Hinduism’. But within the Hindu structure we had several sub-divisions like castes, within that again there were sub-system and this recursion continued down to the family level. There were Brahmins, Kshatriyas, Vaishyas and Sudras each practicing the preached customs. Each followed their own faith. The Brahmin believed in the service of the gods, the Kshatriya believed in the service of the country, etc. There probably was some amount of discrimination among the castes, with the Brahmins being the most respected ones. So was India secular then? The tales of Ramayana and Mahabharata suggest several examples of secularism in ancient India. It is said that in those days the king was chosen based on eligibility rather than on descent. King Bharath had chosen a soldier in his army as his successor over his own children. Somewhere down the line this whole idea of a secular India got lost. Casteism and religion became playthings in the hands of politicians.
The preamble to the Indian Constitution goes,
“We, the people of India, having solemnly resolved to constitute India into a soverign socialist SECULAR democratic republic and to secure to all its citizens:………..”
WE have achieved sovereignty, but what about secularism? Are we secular today? I think not. I am sure a lot of people are bound to disagree with me but I don’t think of India as it exists today as being the secular nation its creators had envisioned. As I said earlier in my opinion the idea of secularism rests on religion, castes, faith, etc.
We, and by ‘we’ I mean the Government and the constitution, discriminate on the basis of
1) caste – Reservations
2) Religion – no Uniform Civil Code.
Then in what sense are we secular? I have no answer to that question.
Let us take it one by one.
Reservations were first introduced to bring about a sense of equality among the suppressed and the ruling castes. Today we cannot say that the once oppressed classes are being denied privileges. Then why do we still need the reservation. In fact, in my opinion, it is reservation that is reminding people of a long forgotten system of caste. As if reservation in public institutions was not enough, there’s a demand for reservations in the private sector too!!!! What is going to be achieved with this attitude? Firstly we’ll deprive another deserving candidate the opportunity she deserved. This is a violation of the democratic part of the preamble.
Secondly, with a substandard work force the organizations would not be able to function properly leading to an economic slowdown which can adversely affect the economy.
The political parties continue to entertain such gimmicks so that their vote bank remains intact. I thus feel Bharat Uday Mission can be the first truly secular organization not believing in this whole farce called reservation and caste systems.

Discrimination based on religion is another major issue. No country in the world has a separate law for Muslims and a separate law for others!!! This idea in itself is atrocious. I have nothing personal against them and wish they would use their better judgement and oppose this policy of playing to the minorities. It is important to understand that this is not against Muslims or against any other religion. All I am saying is that when we claim to be a secular nation then we cannot accommodate such provisions in the Constitution. It is really impossible for me to understand how such a provision actually found its way into the Constitution in the first place. A call for a uniform civil code became such an election issue that it actually decided the mandate of parties. This is pathetic. How can we treat a criminal differently just because he belongs to a particular religion? Reservations for the minority communities are another thing I hope BM will oppose. Bharat Uday Mission can be a torch bearer in this regard. We can be the first organization which does not practise such unethical practices. I honestly cannot understand the idea of pleasing the minorities at the cost of the progress of the nation.
We are a country which once was truly secular, but are we now? Obviously, I don’t think so. So one of the most important goals on the agenda of any organization which claims to work for the rise of a great nation(as Bharat Uday mission claims), should be to work for one of the core ideas which the nation once stood for – SECULARISM.

Sizzling!

Wear a condom.

Today is World Aids Day.
Educate yourself about it.
http://www.aids.org/info/FAQs.html

Take care of yourself and your loved ones.

From anguish to optimism

न हि प्रपश्यामि ममापनुद्याद्
यच्छोकमुच्छोषणमिन्द्रियाणाम् ।
अवाप्य भूमाव्सपत्नम्रद्धं
राज्यं सुराणमपि चाधिपत्यम् ॥

Translation:
I can find no means to drive away this grief which is drying up my senses. I will not be able to dispel it even if I win a prosperous, unrivalled kingdom on earth with sovereignty like the demigods in heaven.

~~**~~**~~**~~
If Arjuna could learn to overcome his distress and go on to fight the war, what I'm going through is nothing.

God does find ways to give us strength. We can hope for a better tomorrow, even if all our dreams have been shattered today.

disillusionment

I know the gayatri mantram. I like Bacardi.
I've learnt Carnatic classical music for 10 years. I use expletives in every second sentence.

I am part of a movement that is supposed to rejuvenate our dying India. I am not secular, in any sense of the term.

What does being secular really mean? Many people tell me that they're truly unbiased and have no kind of religious boundaries. Will they let their daughter/sister/brother/son/bestfriend marry some one from a different religion without any kind of reservations. I sincerely doubt it.

I love wearing sarees. I wear them once a year.
I love Telugu movies. I watch them once a month probably and make fun of them anyway.
It's either "cool" or it "sucks".
I love south Indian food. I don't know how to cook.

I make speeches and have arguments about all issues from poverty to illiteracy to girls wearing short skirts and smoking. I believe I'm a feminist.

What is feminism really? Calling all men chauvinistic? Doubting the validity of everything closely related to a man's success? Lauding Sania Mirza for standing up to them and continuing to wear short skirts on the field? Googling some thing some guy sent me about some young poet who was brutally murdered and mail him back, thanking him for the information?

I love festivals. I get up at 10 in the morning 'cos it's the only holiday I get.
I love the movie "Manushullo Devudu". I don't think I'll actually say this when I'm in Touch grooving mindlessly to some trance crap. Then it's got to be American Beauty or something.
I've read the Bhagvad Gita cover to cover. I have no sense of responsibility. I talk to my parents with utter disrespect sometimes.
I have total faith in the Indian Government and the system. I break rules myself.
When I went to get my passport renewed, I gave some guy outside the office money to get all the papers quickly. The cops came in just then. He sat on the stool in the dingy room and asked the guy to get him tea. I saw this and sat next to the cop on another stool when he said "madam, kade kyun hain?"

I don't go to the temple during "those 5 days". I don't go anyway, unless I have an exam.
I climbed up Tirmala without stopping, without eating a single thing. All I had on the way was water. Not devotion. Not sincerity. I want to boast about this as great achievement of sorts.

I am the new age Indian. The future. With the perfect balance of tradition and modernism.

Amazing.

20

Finally an excuse to write...something!

Rahul tagged Sunith who tagged me.
Rahul tagged Alak who also tagged me(Sun told me yesterday).

So I've to write 20 things about myself. I remember I already did.
sometime last August.

But anyway...

~ This is for Sunith:
I breathe. :P

~ I am not immune to criticism, though that's what I'd like you to believe.

~ There are exactly three people in this world who know exactly how screwed up I am and the rest still love me.

~ I definitely want to go on the HimSagar Express(from Kashmir to Kanyakumari) by myself.

~ I'm a die-hard romantic. I love things the traditional "malle poolu" way.

~ I think tennis and cricket are the only sports worth anything. And I said this much before Sania Mirza even played for India.

~ I am opinionated and I love people who atleast have an opinion, even if it's borrowed. And even if they give into me later, when we argue.

~ I love arguments. And I love that he allows me to win.

~ I make 5 year plans and 10 year plans. But I don't know what I'm going to do tomorrow.

~ This is surely the scariest my life's ever going to get. Crossroads and all that. And it ain't too bad. I'm looking forward to the rest of my life. :)

~ My sunniest of moods can change to absolute rage within seconds. I'm glad I found someone who can handle all the hysteria.

~ I love appadams, sambar and perugannam. Gourmet meals can't get better than that.

~ I love things I don't understand. And if I don't after I've spent 10 minutes on it, it probably didn't really deserve my attention in the first place.

~ I say things. I do things. Even though I regret it the next second. I don't know why.

~ I love music. Singing to it. Swinging to it. Pure joy.

~ I hate people who
1. can't keep a secret
2. gossip
3. are hypocrites
4. seek attention
5. have no self-respect
6. have a superiority complex
7. have an inferiority complex
8. can't communicate
9. don't believe in love
10. give fake compliments
yes, it takes a lot for me to find someone tolerable but once I'm there..

~ I love people who have good handwriting and clean nails, among other things.

~ I believe in God and I just don't get how some people can be agnostic or atheists. You have to believe in some God.

~ My first impression about something/someone is usually the last. It's always love at first sight or..

~ I hate boundaries.

And I have no one else left to tag.

NOTHING!!

a few grumbles and a grouse

Wow do I have a lot of things to crib about today or what!?!?!

First off, why are we so in the habit of bending backwards? We are a country of people who will let everybody trample on us, willingly. I know you have this picture of a neatly dressed saree-clad woman, waiting for her husband to atleast show up for dinner, which she so lovingly prepared. A woman, who gave up her career and her everything to play for the same old "good wife" title. I don't know if this is a global phenomenon. Sure, Felicity did it in Desperate Housewives and Oprah has millions of shows dedicated to battered, raped, physically and mentally abused women. But why is my frame of reference the stupid United States? It happens all over the world. In China, women are treated like mannequins, in Iraq, a little worse than slaves. Oh but the whole point of my ranting was the ill-advised vote against Iran. I don't care if they actually argue that it is a blessing in disguise. How can we succumb to the pressure tactics that the U.S so shamelessly uses? This was our chance, a great opportunity to explore alternative sources of energy because, God knows, we need them. How important is U.S support and approval to us, anyway?
I have always wanted India, China and a few other countries(obviously and definitely excluding the U.S.) to form an alternative to the U.N, and to form some kind of a collaboration much like the European Union. I don't know why Manmohan actually brought up Vajpayee at the discussions with Bush. Maybe it was anti-incumbency that ultimately saw the reigns of India in the Congress' hands but it was Vajpayee's government that made the U.S and especially, Pakistan stop their lousy manipulations and tricks and take notice of a nation, that was only becoming more powerful and a force to reckon with.
Talking of political parties, it is a fact that we have a choice between an uneasy compromise masquerading as a coalition front and one which has lost it's ideology and philosophy in all it's internal squabbles. Which is why I was quite amazed by the Bharat Uday Mission. It's aim of an economically, socially, politically and spiritually developed India is quite ambitious, difficult even. But on the brighter side, there seem to be a lot of motivated people, who really believe that change is possible. I, for one, am absolutely excited to be part of this mission. And to me the change is inevitable.

There are very few things that really get me agitated. Indian cricket is one of them. When is the BCCI ever going to learn that it has to start punishing failure instead of rewarding success? When is the BCCI ever going to stop dithering and take a stand? I've always wanted Ganguly to do what he does best. Take his shirt off and wave it around. In the stands. Off the field. Unfortunately, that's just not happening. Yeah, so he did give the team this aggressive, i'll-kill-'em-all attitude. Bloody crap. What's the point having the attitude when all we can do is win against a stupid African nation? It's funny how the BCCI gave a statement saying that the coach, the captain and players will now be selected and retained based on their performance. So, the good thing is, they've finally accepted that their selection procedure was purely based on failure and ofcourse under-the-table money that they frequently got.

Oh that African nation statement sounded a little harsh. I have nothing against them. If anything, I'm glad that they are getting international support but really still not enough of it. The UN World Summit saw neither a review or an expression of political commitment by the so-called rich nations. Okay, the IMF and the World Bank will finance their debt relief. So, when are they going to start the actual process of nation-building? The Global Call to Action Against Poverty (GCAP) is one movement that is working towards procuring aid for these nations. Their target of 0.7% from the rich nations has still not been met, 35 years after it was first drafted! Africa is one continent that I must visit. All I know is what I see on Discovery Channel, the exotic side of it, filled with beauty and CNN, the impoverished, malnourished side, living with the reality of genocide. Rwanda, Siberia, Sudan - I really don't know what else to do other than signing letters of action on the internet, keeping myself in touch with their world as much as possible and forwarding mails about their living conditions.
I'm preparing for CAT, you see.
Pathetic!

Closer home, what does CBN need to do to win? Keeping the beard doesn't seem to be working for him, unlike someone I know. Instead of concentrating on the Congress' fetish with the Rajiv Gandhi name, he'll benefit by going for a total image change. He should become a scythe-wielding farmer instead of being a laptop-crazy CEO. But that's just a beginning. If he hopes to win the Assembly Elections, he sure as hell, needs to do a lot more.

Now, onto things more personal.
Imagine this. I finally buy the 5 star I've been dying to have all week. I have a bite. Relish it and keep it on my dash board. Saving the rest for a little later. I get down to buy a recharge card. I come back, fuming and pretty pissed off that the idiot didn't have the denomination I wanted. I reach for my lifesaving, 450 calories of pure heaven. It's disappeared. I look up to see his sheepish grin and an empty, crumpled *talking about it chokes me up*. God, someone please tell him to act his age, and not his shoe size.
I don't know what her problem is. I made it quite clear to her that I wanted nothing to do with her or her life. And especially her problems. But she just doesn't leave me alone. Don't even assume that I should be flattered, in some wierd way, to have my very own personal stalker. She's worse. She sends me sentimental messages about friendship and love. I'm not heartless. I just can't stand it anymore. God, someone please tell her to wake up and see my desperate attempts to lose her.
I don't remember the last time I was happy. I'm not talking about the insane, out-of-control happy. I'm talking about that sunshine-made-me-smile kinda joy. I've just stopped feeling it. Small things just don't turn me on anymore. Yeah baby, bring me the diamonds. God, make me a rainbow and help me wonder at it's stunning beauty and all that crap.

And for everybody else's sake, please ensure that all the traffic lights are on green when I'm running late for a movie.

* inspired by Rahul 'cos he said this -
"u r totally kaamless kya these days. looks u r back in form taking personality tests and praising people u like on ur blog"
:) *

this proves i don't lie on personality tests :)

Your Ideal Relationship is Serious Dating

You're not ready to go walking down the aisle. But you may be ready in a couple of years. You prefer to date one on one, with a commitment. And while chemistry is important, so is compatibility.

The same old story - in 50 words

Even after ignoring him for ages, Ras shamelessly tagged me again! This time to write my own story in 50 words! Well, I don't really have a particularly fantastic imagination but here it is. For Ras Malai's sake.

It was 11 pm, raining heavily. I was on the almost deserted platform waiting for him.
I could hear strains of Mohd. Rafi from a radio somewhere.
Transmission interrupted for an announcement.
Train no.2493 from Mumbai has derailed near Chitravali village. Casualties unknown.
That's all it said.
Mere mehboob tujhe....

It's about time..

How freakishly relevant is this??!!??
As always, Pink Floyd is something else!

"Ticking away the moments that make up a dull day
You fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way.
Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town
Waiting for someone or something to show you the way.

Tired of lying in the sunshine staying home to watch the rain.
You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today.
And then one day you find ten years have got behind you.
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun.

So you run and you run to catch up with the sun but it's sinking
Racing around to come up behind you again.
The sun is the same in a relative way but you're older,
Shorter of breath and one day closer to death.

Every year is getting shorter never seem to find the time.
Plans that either come to naught or half a page of scribbled lines
Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way
The time is gone, the song is over,
Thought I'd have something more to say."

suddenly schmaltzy

I saw this spectacularly sappy movie called "Shall We Dance". The only reason I even saw it was because they had an Oprah special on it and you know, I trust Oprah! The only halfway decent line in the movie is... okay you need to know a little about it?!? Susan Sarandon thinks Richard Gere, her husband, is cheating on her. So she hires a detective to keep an eye on him. She meets the detective for dinner one day, nothing sexual, just to get a status report. They fight their own feelings for each other, just implied by Susan's rather heavy breathing around him or his nervous glances. But then she's always the good or the jilted or the dying wife. Remember Step Mom? Anyway, this story has an ending that is too happy even for the greatest optimist to handle. So somewhere after 70 tiresome minutes..

Susan Sarandon: All these promises that we make and then we break , why is it, do you think, that people get married?
Detective: Passion?
Susan Sarandon: No
Detective: What?
Susan Sarandon: Because we need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet. I mean, what does any one life really mean. But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything- the good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things.... All of it. All the time. Everyday. You're saying, "Your life will not go unnoticed, because I will notice it." Your life will not go unwitnessed, because I will be your witness."

And suddenly, it all seems worth it. :)

Oh, the movie has Jennifer Lopez too.

And suddenly it doesn't. :(

Roses are red

They just shouldn't have done this! They shouldn't have started airing Desperate Housewives on Friday night. I've stopped thinking of even daring to dream of making other plans, even by mistake! Man, I'm addicted to the damn show! I'll probably think twice if I had to miss it to go out for dinner on my sister's birthday. I'll definitely think twice if it was with my Jaan! I didn't watch the live telecast of the Emmy's but I sure as hell am glad, Felicity won! Yeah we're Friday friends which gives me the right to call her Feli if I want to. I just love it. I love the fake plastic flowers and the manicured lawns and the cute supposed-to-be-plumber-but-actually-a-detective guy, yes..Mike! You know what, I'm not exaggerating. The reality is, it's much better than all of that.

Anyway, before you imagine a television junkie, let me dazzle you with my brilliance.

Oh gotta sign off. Maybe you'll get lucky some other day! :P

Can this be me?

What Path Do You Take In Life?

You take the Road Less
Traveled. Who
wants to go where everyone else has already gone
anyway? You look for the hidden
paths, ones most don't see and don't care to
venture down. You go boldly and
stand proud discontent with what's been put in
front of you, determined to find
a way perfect for you even no one else will take it
with you. You live as you
want and not for others, but be careful not become
selfish. Others may need you
and you should be there for them, especially the
ones close to you. You tend to
be the leader in most situations and people listen
and trust you not lead them
astray. Your firm in your opinions and beliefs and
unwilling to change yourself
to suit other people. By the same token, you can be
stubborn to a fault, change
isn't always a bad thing you know. Everyone changes
and grows, you shouldn't try
to stay exactly the same or you could be left
behind. Then again, you may change
frequently. Some people change to fit in, you my
little non-conformist, may
change to be set apart. It's great to be different,
but it's also just as great
to have things in common with people, even if those
people are in that "crowd"
you seem to have a vendetta against. Don't try to
be different, just be who you
are, whoever that is and you'll be unique all on
your own. So make some time for
people, let yourself blend into the crowd every
once in awhile, you may just
learn something about them and yourself you never
knew before.

Was on the path of self-discovery and as usual, there was a slight detour.

Does your name begin with: D

Once you get it into your head that you want someone, you move full
steam ahead. You do not give up your quest easily. You
are nurturing and caring. You are highly passionate, loyal, and intense in your
involvements, sometimes possessive and jealous. You are very sharp &
talented often with sense of humour. When people bother to look deep
inside they cannot resist what they see. You are stimulated by the eccentric
and unusual, have a free and open attitude. You get jealous of
other people and lose your temper .

I couldn't have said it better

A WEEK AFTER KATRINA - A LONG-TERM PERSPECTIVE

Author - ANIL CHAWLA

The true test of any individual or society or nation comes when it faces
adversity. United States of America faced such a test on 29 August 2005 when
Hurricane Katrina with wind speeds of more than 100 mph touched ground.
Katrina has been called as "a natural disaster of unprecedented proportions
for America". There can be no disputing the fact that Katrina has caused
extreme destruction in Mississippi, Alabama, and Louisiana (especially
Greater New Orleans). Katrina had a strong impact on Florida. She also
affected Texas, Arkansas, Georgia, Tennessee and many other Eastern U.S.
states.

Having said that, let us note that the percentage of population that has
been affected is less than five or ten per cent of the population of USA.
New Orleans, that has been the worst affected, had a population of less than
half a million before the disaster struck (484,674 as per 2000 census).
USA's population is around 296 million. So, the population of New Orleans is
less than 0.2 per cent of the country's population. Given the fact that USA
is a developed and rich country, it stands to reason that the country should
have had no problems in facing up to an event that affected such a miniscule
percentage of its population.

Compare this with the Tsunami disaster that struck a small poor country like
Sri Lanka (along with India and some others) on 26 December 2004. Sri
Lanka's population is about 20 million. About 40 per cent of the country's
population was affected by Tsunami waves. The number of deaths was much
higher in Sri Lanka than in case of the tragedy in South East USA. Yet, Sri
Lanka faced the disaster with much more aplomb. If my memory serves me
right, there were no rotting corpses in Sri Lanka a week after Tsunami waves
struck. In Sri Lanka there was no looting; there were no rapes; army and
police did not have to fire a single shot against civilians on rampage; and
even though there was a severe shortage of resources, there were no
allegations of discrimination based on either race or religion or caste.

Now compare it with the total anarchy that prevailed in New Orleans. A few
glimpses:

* As I write it, the news has just come in that the people, holed up in the
city's famous (now infamous) sports stadium called Superdome, have been
evacuated. About 70,000 persons had taken shelter in this stadium. Many died
in this shelter due to starvation, dehydration and also due to attacks by
criminal gangs.

* The ambulance service in charge of taking the sick and injured from the
Superdome suspended flights after a shot was reported fired at a military
helicopter. Richard Zuschlag, chief of Acadian Ambulance, said it had become
too dangerous for his pilots.

* Police shot and killed at least five people after gunmen opened fire on a
group of contractors traveling across a bridge on their way to make repairs.

* Organized and well-armed gangs were roaming in the streets, looting empty
houses and ransacking shops.

* There may be no better way to explain the desperation on the city's
ravaged streets than this: In the past few days, two police officers took
their lives with their own weapons and dozens have turned in their badges.

* On Tuesday, 6 September, corpses were still lying all around the place.
Probably, the priority is to move the living before taking care of the dead.

* Voluntary, religious and charity organizations have been conspicuous by
their absence. One reads that about USD 300 or 400 million has been raised
by charity organizations including Red Cross but there are hardly any
volunteers out in the field helping out.

* There are widespread accusations that African Americans (blacks, in
politically incorrect language) are being discriminated against. African
Americans formed 67 per cent of the population of New Orleans.

* Tsunami had come without prior warning, but there was a warning of at
least two clear days for Katrina. On Sunday, 28 August New Orleans Mayor,
Ray Nagin, had ordered mandatory evacuation of the city. All those who had
cars fled. Motorways were jammed. George Bush declared state of emergency.
But no one made any arrangements for evacuation of poor people (read blacks)
who did not own cars. They just moved into shelters like the one in
Superdome where they were abandoned to rot, without food, water, toilet
facilities and police protection.

The picture that emerges from the above glimpses is one of sheer neglect and
callous insensitivity of a country, which claims to be the world's richest
and most powerful. There have been strong comments from various quarters
about the attitude of President George W Bush and his team during this
crisis. He was vacationing when the crisis occurred and he took it very
lightly. It has also been said that he suffers from a
compulsive-obsessive-disorder that forces him to focus exclusively on Iraq
and the so-called war against terrorism even when there is a category-five
hurricane knocking at his doors. These are strong words about a person who
is surely, human and suffers from infirmities that all humans, and in
particular politicians across the world, are susceptible to.

It is easy and a bit too tempting to join the chorus of Skin-Bush-Alive (not
counting the innumerable unprintable slogans about Bush circulating on the
net). While one cannot defend George W Bush, it is important to understand
that the malaise is more deep-rooted and will not disappear if George Bush
is hanged on the nearest electric pole.

Sitting in India, nobody I know can understand how a rape can occur in a
sports stadium packed with 70,000 people. Women in India feel safe when
there is a crowd and are afraid only when it is lonely. Temporary camps are
routinely set up in India to house persons displaced due to either floods or
riots or tsunami or some other calamity. Police protection in such camps is
virtually non-existent. Yet, women have never felt unsafe in any such camp.
There must be something drastically wrong in a society that cannot remain
peaceful and orderly without an omnipresent policeman.

Americans like to talk about this or that poor country drifting into
statelessness. The truth is that their own country has reached the stage of
societylessness. Society, as an organic being, has ceased to exist in USA.
New Orleans, with its population of less than half a million, is a small
town. In any small town in India, everybody seems to know everyone else and
while in normal times there may be petty rivalries and quarrels, in times of
crisis, the whole town stands up together as one. This did not happen in New
Orleans. The looting, ransacking, intimidation, rapes, and murders were the
handiwork of citizens of New Orleans. The so-called normal law-abiding
citizens had no spirit or willingness to rise up and face the destructive
elements within their own brethren. Each one of them trusted the state to
take care of these matters and abdicated their responsibility as a
responsible member of the society. The fiasco at New Orleans would hopefully
make Americans realize that there can be a society and a country without a
formal state, but a state without a society has a precarious existence.

Every society needs leaders and traditionally persons heading the state have
provided leadership to the society in times of crisis. Though, of course,
there are many other leaders that spring up in difficult times. New Orleans,
in particular and USA, in general, have suffered from the total absence of
leadership. New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin has been fuming over what George W
Bush did not do. He may well be right. But there are things that Ray Nagin
has also failed to do. He failed to provide leadership to his people in this
hour of crisis. I saw an aerial photograph of large number of inundated
school buses lined up in a yard. Why were these not called up on the day
before the hurricane struck to move people out of town? Was it not possible
to make teams among people holed up in the Superdome to take up self-defense
and policing? Was it not possible to contact, inspire and motivate voluntary
agencies across USA to take up relief work? No American commentator has
raised these questions. Probably because, all this sounds too strange in a
country where people are held together by the order of law implemented by
the state. In most other countries, social bonds and duties are stronger and
more important than laws laid down by the state. In times of crisis and
adversity, it is these social bonds and duties that help the society
survive. In USA there is no society, it is just individuals who tolerate
each other to the extent that the policeman in the street bids them to. When
there is no policeman, some of these individuals jump at the throats (or
groins) of some others, while everyone else just looks away.

United States of America must take a critical look at its social bonds and
structures. For two centuries or so the values of America have been
selfishness and self-centeredness. Religion, as a way of thinking and life,
has been dying a slow death in the mainstream of American thought. There is
no doubt that Christianity is today more potent force in American politics
than it ever was in the past hundred years. Conservatives and evangelists,
who exploit Christianity as a political weapon, have reduced Christianity to
either a ritual of going to Church every Sunday or parroting all that is
written in the Bible or a set of family values where one rises above one's
own selfishness and spends quality time with one's children on every
weekend. The classic Christian values of compassion, universal brotherhood,
love and care, willingness to sacrifice one's pleasures for the other - are
essential for the existence of any society. It is these values that seem to
have vanished from United States of America.

An oriental value that could possibly be useful for America is respect for
elders. Americans see old persons as painful but unavoidable baggage. In
oriental societies, old and experienced provide moral guidance. In a way, at
a micro level, aged persons provide leadership to the society in eastern
countries. In the absence of such a leadership in America, might-is-right or
bullyism or ruffianism holds sway, as it happened in the Superdome at New
Orleans.

But, one cannot really blame the bullies of New Orleans. They were only
doing what America has been doing for the past many decades on the
international arena. Unfortunately for USA, the ethos of might-is-right when
internalized among her own people leads to results, which are truly
terrible.

Hurricane Katrina, in spite of its category five status, would have only
been a small blip in the history of USA. But by exposing the collapse of
society in USA and by demonstrating her incapability of handling adversity,
the hurricane has created circumstances that will influence the progress of
world history in the next few decades. USA has too many enemies across the
world. While you and I sympathize with the unfortunate people of New
Orleans, the enemies of USA are rubbing their hands with glee at having seen
a big chink in the armor. They know that a nation without a society cannot
face adversity and a country that cannot face adversity is doomed, sooner or
later. Many of these enemies of USA predict that USA will meet the same fate
as USSR, probably even worse than that. Time alone will prove them either
right or wrong.

If the people of USA look at Katrina as a blessing in disguise and see her
as an opportunity for them to understand their weaknesses as a society and
rebuild the damaged social structure of their country, 29 August 2005 would
be remembered as the golden turning point in the history of USA. On the
other hand, well, I dread to even imagine that. Please join me in wishing
the best to America and her people!



ANIL CHAWLA


6 September 2005

Some results ain't so bad. :)

What Classic Movie Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

candy and vinegar

I wasn't really surprised. These days I hardly find anything inspiring. It was like watching a rerun of Friends for the millionth time. Just another joyless incident that I want to dramatize and demand sympathy about. Oh it isn't even important.

"Impossible is just a big word thrown around by small men who find it easier to live in the world they've been given than to explore the power they have to change it. Imposible is not a fact. It's an opinion. Impossible is not a declaration. It's a dare. Impossible is potential. Impossible is temporary. Impossible is nothing." - Adidas

Had the Vinayaka Chathurthi fiasco again. Same old story. Same absurd pretentiousness. Same plastic smiles. It was plain tiresome. Then why do I even go and participate in this horseplay?

I don't know why L.K.A and Vajpayee are at loggerheads. That too over Khurana. He doesn't seem to me, a significant enough player on the political front. Yeah so he was the CM of Delhi and he must be having a lot of muscle support in the NCR region, which automatically translates into a number of votes but just suppose Vajpayee had supported or even not shown dissent on this issue, atleast the BJP wouldn't look so vulnerable. So open to criticism. It's pathetic. But atleast Bihar has some kinda options, other than Laloo Prasad Yadav! All the million communist parties that seem to have mushroomed everywhere. That reminds me of a really dumb joke.
I don't know how some people are naturally gifted with the ability to narrate jokes well. They make even the most insipid ones sound hilarious!
Anyway an Indian and an American..yeah age-old face-off..wonder why Manmohan is such a meek come-and-take-what-you-want kinda man.. Anyway, an Indian and an American argue about who has the better scientific capabilities and technologies.
The American says, "a woman once gave birth to a child without a leg and our world famous surgeons made an artificial one for him and now he's an athletic champion."
So the Indian retorts, "a woman once gave birth to a child without a head and our world famous surgeons put a coconut right there and he became the CM in India!"

I'm just addicted to Rockstar INXS. I was rooting for Jordis till last week but she seems to have lost all her confidence and she's out of the competition. Now, Marty definitely has my vote. He's better then that overtly envious JD.

I read this post on my boyfriend's blog about how girls are supposed to be these mystrious creatures.
Baby, I have news for you. All it takes is a phone call, a message, some innovative ways of saying "I love you" and maybe carnations once in a while. It's not a conversation filler. It's not another way of saying you're sorry. It's not a weapon, it's not a refuge. It loses it's value when it's overused. It loses it's magic when it's underplayed. It's a commitment, not a last resort. It's a promise, not a compromise. It's damn good fun and I want it to stay that way. For all I care, you can go to Bangalore or Stanford or Timbaktu but just come home to me.
I am an insecure, obsessive fool. That doesn't mean I don't trust you. That's just the way I love you.

I'm 21 and surviving!

:)

"Love gratified is love satisfied, and love satisfied is indifference begun."

Samuel Richardson (1689-1761)

i can't get no.... satisfaction

i'm not going to obsess over who wishes me tomorrow and who forgets.(yeah i know i'm doing it one day before the actual BIRTH day).

my dad's here for my 21st.. my best friend's missing classes and his girlfriend to be with me 'cos it's really hard for me to deal with the balloons and the confetti..(yeah crap!).. some idiot actually wished me today.. my family's throwing me a "surprise" karaoke party.. my friends are doing this midnight dinner thing.. yeah chocolate cake can make up for just about everything.. it's purely hormonal..

i have to make peace with the fact that i'm never going to be a female irfan or a maria ... or a yelena... someone told me there's no famous female sculptor.. now if u're actually gonna research this and tell me that some woman already holds the distinction.. i'm getting someone to murder you and trust me, it's gonna be slow and painful...

how can all of you be so happy on your birthday?? don't u ever take the time to look at your worthless life and feel miserable about it?
'cos all i can think of in the entire week leading up to my birthday is about all the could-have-beens and the should-have-beens and it's just distressing to live with the what-is.

if only i could turn back time..

or if only it's miraculously september 2nd tomorrow...

bloody illusory shit.. bloody ambitions.. absolute ignis fatuus..

if you really wanna make my day.. don't wish me.
i'm not using reverse psychology.. i mean it.. don't mail me, don't call me, don't text me.. this is my desperate attempt to make sure i'm not disappointed tomorrow when i don't get calls from the people i so desperately want atleast a phone call from..

god birthdays suck.. they do this to me..

3 more hours!!!!!!!!

I'm just not ready for the responsibility!!

I don't wanna be 21!!!

I'm not paranoid.

I'm just OLD!

:(

The Search for Men/Women of Honour

"If you think you are beaten even before the battle begins, chances are you can never win."

Do you know YUVA was a true story of a guy called George Reddy from Osmania University? Lecturers were afraid to teach because they weren't confident they could answer his questions, he was outstanding. Apart form being academically brilliant he was a prominent student leader and everyone was sure he would win a seat in the assembly. George Reddy fought against the politically powered devils & bureaucrats, to every one’s shock George Reddy was killed by ABVP activists (another student group and inner organization of BJP). This happened around mid 80’s. Students who were all educated in and around Osmania University limits know about the war of George Reddy. We lost a great student leader, whose dream did not come true until this day.

Many Indians seem to firmly believe that it is impossible to change our society, but we can't allow the fear of failure or persecution to prevent us from trying to do something we know needs to be done. We would never do anything in life if we feared failure, it didn't stop our forefathers from fighting for our freedom though many were killed in the process (It doesn't stop me from lighting the stove even though I hear about gas cylinder explosions) . Just imagine what would have happened if people like Gandhiji,Abraham Lincoln, Neslon Mandela, etc. never existed or worse they never ever tried to do something for their Countries. And these were ordinary men to begin with but made extra-ordinary contribution to world history.

In our present day we have people like George Reddy, S.K.Dubey (who sent a letter to PM about a scam and he got killed later on) who tried to bring about some change in our society but couldn't, is it because they were individual attempts and may have lacked proper support and organization after all Gandhiji wasn't alone when he peformed Satyagraha.

"The thing with HISTORY is you never know when you are making it or being part of it."

In India you can say there are about 10-20% of the people who are the oppressors, the guys with the power and who misuse it and the rest I believe are just victims at some point or the other. And though the victims out number the oppressors we lack the unity and the courage to stand firmly behind the guy who atleast dares to stand up against these oppressors. Once the guy who dares to stand up is taken out of the way the whole movement seems to die. Everyone gets back to their normal lives and they seem to be content with the way things are rather than trying to make things better. You see movies like YUVA which were supposed to encourage the
youth to get into politics to help our country, but then just as the posters come off people seem to forget all about the message. I would go something beyond YUVA and not limit myself to just 3 people, I would say form a party with all honest, sincere, intelligent people, young or old and if they can come to power don't you think things would change? Is it difficult to find these honorable men/women from the 800 million victims of the system?

Unless we put up an Ad in the Classifieds "Required Men/Women of Honour to lead our country",It seems difficult to bring these men out from the crowd and also make stay united. But when the american youth who are considered cultureless and with loose morals can cause a major havoc during the Vietnam war by rebelling against their government can't we, the more refined and cultured Indians help find these Honourable Men/Women and lead our country towards a better tomorrow.

----
Copypasted this from somewhere on the internet.
Gave me a lot to think about.
This Independence Day, maybe we can decide to be the honourable "men" and lead our country towards a better tomorrow.

I can't use this on-screen keyboard anymore.

Time
to
think
about
what
YOU
can
do
for
yor
country.

Have a contemplative weekend!!

NoOpportunityWasted!!!

Imaginehowdifficultitisformetoblogwithoutthemostimportantkeyonthekeyboardworking!

Mystupidspacebar'sfinallygivenuponme.

Tillthenyoucantryanddeciphertheunderlyingmethodinthismadnessorjustignorethispost.

Ifyou'vecomethisfar,youmightaswellreadmytwocentsofphilo.

Godisnowhere.

what
did
you
read?
God
is
now
here
OR
God
is
nowhere.

justabeautifulwayofsaying-

LIFE
IS
A
PERCEPTION
OF
THE
MIND.

"The turning point of greatness is a dream."

Now that's a thought.

Stolen Moments

I hate stupidity.
That statement obviously assumes that I am intelligent. Secondly, that I recognize stupidity(been there, done that?). Third, that it's the stupidity and not the person involved that I hate.
So, let me make it absolutely clear. I hate stupid people. Animals or babies(both of which I'm not too fond of) behaving stupidly is pardonable but otherwise...

I hate criticism.
Especially from people who are in no position to judge me. There is no such thing as constructive criticism. It's either my way or the wrong way. Funniest thing is when stupid people criticize me. That's the combination that makes me question the whole intelligence imbalance that exists.

Anyway, apart form all that people-hating(which I seem to be making a habit), I did some wonderful things last week.

I bunked College on Thursday and went for the morning show of Dus with my Jaan and then came back home by 3:30, looking all tired, hard day's work at college and all that. Then my mom opens the door and says, "Thank God you're back, we have to rush to Prasad's. I don't want to miss that 'Dus Bahane' song!"
It's not a bad movie but I just couldn't tolerate watching it twice in a single day!
Yeah I agree. That wasn't so wonderful.

Organizing the Pankaj Udhas concert for CRY was an amazing experience!
I made lots of new friends, real phenomenal people, all of whom seem quite determined to make a difference, to underprivileged children and to India.
The concert itself was a huge success. I went to pick him up from the airport with another CRY rep from Chennai. He was really nice. He spoke to me and asked me about Taramathi. What I loved was, he gave me an 'I-recognize-you' smile when all the CRY vols had a photo session with him later in the evening. I knew a couple of his songs but frankly he's not God's gift to the ghazal world or anything. But I still went and bought his album 'Stolen Moments' and it's quite good. His accompanying artists were much better than him. Purely a personal opinion, don't get all mad at me. Hariprasad Chaurasia's nephew played the flute. Man, I swear his melodies were just divine!
The rain almost ruined it. The show was scheduled to start at 7 but ended up starting at 8:30 and people still kept coming, all drenched, even at 10 pm. I thougth that was pretty cool.
Oh let me tell you something funny. Our CRY rep gave me his phone to receive all the calls because he had something more important to do. I got a call from some gentleman saying he was Mr.Pankaj Udhas's friend and that he wanted passes for the show. The first time, I was quite polite and said that none of the passes were complimentary but he kept persisting and then I kinda blew up and said, "Hey, if you're PU's friend then why the hell don't you call him?" I thought I was being very smart. But what's worse is the man did turn up and is the proud owner of what he calls "that little restaurant called Paradise". Oh man, I swear I didn't know where to hide!!!
We were there at Viceroy till around 12 that night. We discussed all our glitches, had dinner and generally made fun of everyone. I left the place with Nits in a car which had a punctured tyre. He actually drove down that dangerous slope near Whisper Valley and back up without using the spare tyre. I'm so sure he forgot to keep one in his car! Anyway, point is, I had so much fun that day and all my friends enjoyed themselves too. There is something just magical about a drive at 2 am in the morning with a slight drizzle. You know exactly how that feels :) and all the others are losing out.

an interesting conversation, after a very long time

An email conversation that I absolutely had to share with you..

1. Check out this link
http://www.swordoftruth.com/swordoftruth/archives/byauthor/navaratnarajaram/moafaf.html

2. you're scaring me with the saffron waving fanaticism

1. its not fanaticism......
its the truth and to be frank i expected you to agree...

2. to be frank...to someone their ancient mosque may be
as important as our ancient temple. this is just the
sort of mail which whips up sentiments. im not saying
that you're doing it deliberately, and hey, you're
free to do what you think is right. that is the
ultimate power of a democracy.

remember, these are the same people who brought down
the babri masjid, who raped bilkis bano, who burned
graham staines and his two little boys. you may argue
that they're different, more educated, less savage.
but education and civilization are but a slight veneer
over the brutal savagery that is innate to some human
beings.

1. nope you have to understand that burning graham staines was an act of frustration no one knows what exactly happened. anyways i am not with burning him.i agree it was a savage act and i condemn that . whom aer you talking about when you said ," these are the same people.." i just gave you a link to an interesting article . that s all.
no i am not saying this to express myself . i am also trying to bring people over to my school of thought . i am not a firebrand bajrang dal guy . but i think its time we start being assertive. It disgusts me that nothing is being done about ayodhya. btw, it was no structure of relgious importance .its sole purpose was to demonstrate muslim superiority over hindus. we have forever been very tolerant but i hate people misunderstanding that as our softness. and believe me i am not talking of an ethnic cleansing here. i feel strongly for peaceful coexistence but lets not be taken forgranted as harmless powerless individuals. and you cannot argue wit hthe fat that hinduism is the most scientific way of life and it is in perfect harmony with the nature. I hate it when someone dares to insult it. Thats all. Think about it.there are so many plays being staged everywhere, all of which are some kind of a spoof on some mythological story. I dare any one to do a similar thing using mohd. or allah.

2. frustration? frustration means punching something, not
burning.

everybody knows exactly what happened, the bajrang dal
activists, led by one mr dara singh, cornered him and
set fire to his old jeep/land rover. also sleeping
inside were his 2 sons, aged 11 and 8. dara singh
confessed to this, after being captured by the police.

i don't understand what mythological spoofs and plays
you are referring to...yes, underwear and toilet seats
should certainly not bear ganesha or durga as a motif,
but i fail to see where the spoofs are.

just fyi...all over the world you can buy everything
from tshirts to bikinis with the cross on it. no one
objects.

it is arrogant to say that the mosque had no religious
significance. if that was so, why not raze the temple
and turn it into a waste dumpyard, or a cattle shed?
these are much more humiliating things.

i am not denying that the islam of babar and ghazni
was focussed on the subjugation of kafirs, or
non-believers. but you must also remember that from
this line came akbar, jehangir, and shah jahan, who
married hindus, made peace with hindu kings, and
ensured communal harmony.

religion is not a tit-for-tat system. hinduism teaches
one to forgive a lesser mortal for his or her sins. so
does christianity. i wish we would remember that, and
just let the babri masjid/temple be as it is. just
because babar pulled it down doesn't mean we should
pull it down too...

the thing is, what do you define as a scientific way
of life? hinduism is conspicuous by being the only
major religion with no prophets or living gods. in
fact, it is the only religion which can trace its
roots back to animist beliefs. pashupati = shiva etc.
it would then be logical that since hinduism is
probably the worlds oldest religion, it has
incorporated various daily aspects, unlike say
christianity.

it may interest you to know that the prophet mohammed
has another book accredited to him called the hadith.
it is actually a collection of sayings and anecdotes
which form the basis of the sharia, or islamic law. in
it he very clearly defines certain principles, and
ways to live life. that's pretty scientific too...

i am also a hindu. unfortunately that is a very vague
definition. i was born into a predominantly hindu
family, so i suppose that's what brought me into the
fold. i have no hatred for sikhs, muslims, or
christians. i dislike people who monopolize religion
and try to impose their views upon others. there's a
catholic girl in my class who shouts at people who say
"jeezus christ". i shouted back at her. no one has any
right to tell you what to do.

Maybe we as a country don't object to hinduism being
dissed, because we have better things to worry about.
our per capita income is one of the lowest in asia.
every day, people die of starvation. millions come to
cities in search of work, and are forced into beggary
or prostitution. we can ill afford to waste precious
resources building temples, while people outside the
temple drop dead from hunger

maybe the fact that we don't react shows that we are
secure in our faith. if someone stupid calls you a
fool, would you react or just ignore him? yes, if he
used your picture on his underwear, you should
protest. but why bother to pay attention to radicals?

To be continued...
(Waiting for the reply)

Sarkar is India's answer to The Godfather.

There wasn't a single moment in the movie where I felt things were getting painful. After 39 hours without sleep, a 10.45 pm show with I-row seats seemed like an invitation to hell. But you know what, as things always turn out with me, it wasn't.
It doesn't glorify crime. Maybe there was a deliberate attempt to make the Sarkar resemble Bal Thackeray but here, Amitabh doesn't get to fire someone just because they've been too honest. Yeah Suresh Prabhu isn't really important enough for RGV to accomodate in his script. The background score is the usual Company, Satya rehash. I didn't know Kay Kay was even capable of acting. But then, I don't know a lot of things. I don't know why they had to have a break in the movie. The stupid Samsung Washing machine ad was such a distraction!
Thing is, I loved the movie. If you haven't already watched it, what the hell were you doing all these days?

It's always you

Love, even if it's felt only for a single moment, lasts forever.

Lucky. I have it for a lifetime.

Just wanted to say...

...different things to different people and I hate giving explanations but it made too much sense to me to post this on my blog.

1. ... Thanks, for everything.

I may not be a call away like I promised I'd always be, I may not be there when you need me. We're almost in different worlds now. You are always on my mind. Thanks for being such an awfully bitter memory, that I can't forget you even if I tried. :P Trust me, you are something else.

2. ... Happy Birthday.

It's not like I've ever seen you but I feel like I know you. There's a reason that's a cliche. 'Cos it's true. Anyway, I feel terrible for not being the first one to wish you like I promised myself I would. I hope you have the best year ever! I guess I've already thanked you for every single thing you did and everything you're going to do for me in the next 50 years. :) So...

3. ...Sorry.

That was the only thing left to say other than Best of Luck and I probably owe a million people a million apologies for every selfishly insensitive thing I've done and for all the promises I seem to have broken.

I took a psychometric test this morning to "understand what the perfect career" was for me. I know the impracticality of these tests is too much to ignore. They usually tell you what you already know or confuse you into taking 5 more tests just to see if the results vary. I scored shamefully low on compassion, politeness and patience. Apparently(and thank God for it), I'm not "fit" for Customer Care positions. Anyway, I apologise profusely to everyone who's been affected by my lack of those wonderful personality traits. They're just words to me and I'm going to try and convince myself that the test was flawed.

Why do Mondays do this to me???

Unnecessary

We seek
a relationship's infinity,
the question is
can you reach out
to another's divinity?

I've become a little obsessed with divinity(yeah divya, divine...get the drift? You genius, you!!) and with the concept of a life(oh yeah it's the "my life" thing again!) that trancends these imaginary boundaries I seem to have created around myself. A life I should learn to aspire to, or if I'm already there, get accustomed to. Or is it just an illusion I yearn for?

There are so many things I take for granted, so many times I really undervalue the people in my life. Some of you who read this already know that and you're still reading? And that's what I love you for and this is what you love me for.
All the issues that affect me are quite pathetic too. Sure, some words are hurtful and some people are horrendous(this is more than a compliment for the people I'm talking about). Why can't I rise above it all and give a beatific smile and feel completely satisfied with myself? Why can't I disregard it? But I can't. I'm no Mahatma Gandhi. Talking of him, check THIS out.
It's a little controversial. Take it with a pinch of salt 'cos some of it may be out of context. Poor Advani's also in trouble 'cos of it. Atleast for me, that's a lesson learnt. 3 days of Advani bashing(I apologize, Mr. L.K.A) and it took a Barkha Dutt to convince me about the whys and whats of everything he said.

Anyway, since this is an I-centric post(like everything else here)..
Though I'm 20(atleast for another 2 and a half months), I remember only about 13-14 years, most of which have crystal clear images and even technicoloured motion pictures, but the rest are hazy. A few snapshots here and there. Nothing satisfactory or even reliable. For all I know and for the little that I care, they may only be a figment of my hyperactive imagination. A quarter of my life has already been squandered on wishful thinking and ambitious planning. It hasn't been completely futile. I've done some supposed-to-be exceptional things in areas even 2 year olds can be exceptional at. I believe I have the ability to leave a lasting impression. This can be positive or negative, I guess. Your brain can take you wherever you want to go. Obviously since your opinion doesn't count, you can save some of your thinking cells if you just don't.

Now, since we have complete control of our lives(unfortunately except financially), is it possible to programme ourselves to be whatever we want? If life is just a perception of the mind, can we tune ourselves into thinking success? So if I think success, am I actually successful? Or is the "I think, ergo I am" thing just a load of crap? Are we always going to be within these limits like money(relative wealth) and status(also relatively speaking)? Is it impossible to live outside of these barriers? Will I always be worried about my next pay cheque and if I'll
get to college/work alive and in time? What about all the new horizons I want to explore?
What do I want? What do I need? What do I lack? Another few 4 word questions and we've got the lyrics for a ridiculous boy band song.

Yeah well. "Life is a lesson. You learn it when you're through". Atleast that was Linkin Park talking/singing and not some...

deviation 3: China, cricket, music and nothing else really

What is with all this "bridge of friendship"(that's what Wen said) between India and China? Yeah get over that Srinagar-Muzaffarabad bus hangover and take a long hard look at what's happening on the other side of the country. We signed an agreement with China on the border issue and they want to avoid any large-scale military action along the LAC. What is an agreement going to do anyway? All it has is a set of guiding principles and some kind of roadmap about what should be done. "For long, the Chinese have used terms such as 'fair and reasonable solution' based on mutual accommodation and mutual understanding, but refrained from stating clearly what these mean in the public domain." And now even Sikkim isn't a bone of contention anymore. So who's going to actually sit down and do it and when?
We Indians are total suckers for sweet-talk. Yesterday Wen said that China would support India's bid to be a PM at the UNSC. Now, all they're saying is that they "support" our country's aspirations. What the hell is that supposed to mean? All this diplomacy that China's showing is really pretty screwed up! China's playing it really safe. Not giving any clear, categorical statement. This will mean that all the 4 countries seeking to be PMs will now have to take a vote of confidence from all the members. Obviously they'll probably approve Brazil's or Japan's claim 'cos India is really too strong already and a position in the SC with a veto power will only make it omnipotent.
The only good thing, which is quite contrasting with our relationship with Pak, is that tho' India and China have our border disputes, we have made progress in other areas, such as trade and intelligence exchange. Indo-China trade is predicted to reach 20 billion USD by 2008. That is big money and China seems to be understanding the impact and value of a positive relationship with India. But why then do they have so many nuclear trading agreements with Pakistan? According to Wen, they're going to be used only for peaceful purposes like generation of energy etc. But you know what, I don't buy it. More later.
That's the damn thing. We have so many issues at the macro level that problems at the micro level, such as poverty and illiteracy, are being overlooked by the Govt. And that's where people like you and I can really make a difference. We should, in every little way that we can. There are so many NGOs in and around the area you live, study or work in. If you're really interested, all you need to do is google "volunteer place" and I'm sure you'll find there are a million things you can do. And if you feel that is too much trouble you can even volunteer online.

So that's all I've been doing. Watching TV the whole damn day and hanging on that stupid Wen's words, okay, his translator's words. I believe that this visit will decide the direction that the Indo-China relationship and thus the Indo-US relationship will take. Okay fine, I was switching between 24X7, DD Sports and VH1.
It's this amazing new music channel. If you're not getting it, you're missing something. Only music and not that shitty J Lo kinds. Mostly English classics and there are no ads, no vjs. I'm telling you, it's pure music heaven!
Been tripping over Alms for Shanti too. Amazing music. Amazing lyrics.

Anyway, Indian cricket seems to have hit a new low. We lost the World Cup to those Aussies. We were thrashed actually. I did say Saurav should emulate Mithali, didn't I? I eat my words. The Indian gals were totally unprofessional. There were actually 4 run outs. She blamed it on nerves! Beat that! It wasn't even being aired anywhere so I had to stay online and keep checking the score on cricinfo. It wasn't worth it at all.
Saurav isn't showing off his brilliance either. He was run out today. Everything seems to be working against him. Luckily, we won the toss. Otherwise, trust me he would've been in trouble. But no matter what people say, Saurav took Indian cricket to a new level. He's the captain for good reason. He atleast brings something of a killer instinct into the team. He is a great leader. I can't believe he's banned for the next 6 matches. I just hope the stupid selectors don't consider this a good way of promoting Dravid to the captain's position permanently. Rahul's amazing and I worship the man but I just don't think he's captain material. Today, he didn't do too well. Atleast his strike rate was good. What's the point? We lost in the end. But it was quite an exciting match. It was down to the last ball and I really think Saurav gave Sachin the ball for the last over 'cos he's the only one all the Indian supporters will forgive even though we lost the match. Imagine anyone else in his position. We would have almost murdered him. Today he played like the Sachin everybody's crazy about. He was awesome on the field. He made a fantastic century. He bowled like a dream till the last ball. Can't deny it. There's just something about Sachin. :)
I guess now we just have to watch Narain Karthikeyan and Pankaj Advani doing supposed-to-be pathbreaking things in sports I don't even care about. As if you can even call billiards a sport!

Oh this is the best! I'm going to Delhi for the cricket match!!! Yeah, I am! Go green with envy now! No matter how much I criticize the sport and the players involved, there really isn't anything like cricket to get my blood rushing! Just love the game man. I know I'm being quite irresponsible and all. I have my end sems from the 19th but then my dad's here for some meetings, my mom's anyway going there this Friday on work and Kav has vacations and they're the absolute best people to watch any match with. They're just big time crazy fun and when my dad came up with the idea(the last match we'd seen as a family was that sad West Indies-Zimbabwe World Cup match in Hyd), I really couldn't resist! Cricket fever baby!!

deviation 2: cricket, cricket, cricket

Saurav Ganguly should learn how to be a real captain from Mithali.

Anyway, India vs Australia finals tomorrow. Better than feeling sorry for our Indian Cricket team(125/6 now)! Pathetic man!! Anyway, it'll be aired on DD. I saw the semifinals against New Zealand. It's really as gripping as men's cricket and in many ways better, 'cos the women's team showed such great spirit. They played like they were born to win this. They're the real champions. Don't forget to cheer for them!

deviation 1: The Pakistan Connection

Probability of a Pakistani Prime Minister to be shot is 78 %.
Probability of a Military General to be shot is 42%. Find the joint
probability of a Prime Minister to be shot who is also a Military
General.
You can probably guess the answer without really solving it. But someone I know did. This is another one on the list of things I'm gonna remember forever and mock him about, apart from the History Channel thing. Now, don't even ask me what that is!
He's the geek! :* Anyway, you have to read this. It's a great opinion about everything that's happening in our country.
Have a great weekend!

Imagine

Imagine there's no heaven,
It's easy if you try,
No hell below us,
Above us only sky,
Imagine all the people
living for today...

Imagine there's no countries,
It isnt hard to do,
Nothing to kill or die for,
No religion too,
Imagine all the people
living life in peace...

Imagine no possesions,
I wonder if you can,
No need for greed or hunger,
A brotherhood of man,
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world...

You may say Im a dreamer,
but Im not the only one,
I hope some day you'll join us,
And the world will live as one.

This is one of the most beautiful songs I've ever heard. It's been playing in my head for a while now(apart from that 'simple si coffee' song :P).

God it's Monday!!

Rahul Dravid is God...

...and that's all I have to say about that. :)

Just another Divya day

Life is a bitch. Or maybe not.

It's a Saturday, 6 something pm. I have friends, calling me up, making plans. I don't want to go. I spent the last two hours, feeling like I can sell my soul to the devil to be able to sing like I used to, write like I used to, just smile like I used to.
I'm home alone. Nobody to give me morality lectures 24/7. Nobody to remind me(just casually) that I've been online too long and I have a BIG test on Monday. Stupid Monday. Nobody making half-burnt baingan bartha and expecting me to count my blessings(Atleast you have food to eat!). Nobody trying to complain that I am the one who's to blame for the Tsunami. Nobody telling me that this is a 'very crucial year'. Nobody fighting with me for the remote. It's overhyped, I tell you. Being home alone sucks!

Cricket fever. More like cricket diarrhoea. Everybody becomes an armchair cricketer. In my family, sanity takes a backseat. Everybody has an opinion about how Gautam Gambhir should've played a specific shot. I just question the fact that he's even there. My sister considers herself to be a good luck charm and sits in a specific position at a specific end at the edge of the sofa. My mother's no less. She has a blue cup. The cup of elixir. She actually believes having coffee from that cup, gives Rahul Dravid and the team a nudge in the right direction. I've become a family room outcast. Just 'cos I said V.V.S. would be out the next over and unfortunately, for the country, him and me, he did. Was in College yesterday. Sending frantic messages to Raha. "What's the score? How many wickets? How many overs? Who's bowling? Who's getting a royal reality-bites session? Message back immediately. My life depends on it!". It was a sad draw, anyway. Ofcourse, it was fixed. We can't let the Pakis lose their first match on Indian soil. We have to return the favour. Ganguly should have been braver and elected to bat. Dravid should've never gotten married to that ugly doctor b**ch. It was Friday, yesterday. Those Pakis must've prayed their a$$es off. I've run out of excuses. That's cricket for you. Just cant help falling in love with it.

I like being upset about things that don't matter. It gives me a crazy sense of importance. When things go right, as they sometimes will, I just find a way to screw it over. I'm optimistic. Okay, thats a half truth. I am great at giving instant pick-me-up speeches to myself. I've felt this PMS depression a million times before. Okay every month almost. And the darkest hour is just 60 minutes of agony. I can handle that. But I won't. Just for fun.

"Love means never having to say you're sorry". Go ahead. Have your two-second laugh and come back to reality.
I do the most questionable things sometimes. It makes me feel pathetic. I was horrible and rude. Totally out of character(or maybe very expected the way some people see it). I said things I didn't mean. Gave vent to all my anger(at what or whom, don't even ask). I selfishly side-stepped all the happy things we could talk about and kept targetting my I-wanna-kill-you lines at him. Hurt him. Knew I was doing it but I just didn't stop. Not the first time. It's happened before. I've promised that it wouldn't happen again. It has. Another broken promise. Another fight. Another tear. Another apology. Another promise. The love grows and my momentary lapses of self-restraint continue. I am partially disgusted with myself. But then, self-love can never lose. In the end, it doesn't even matter.

I'm just so glad some things are a given.
:*

Now, I'm happy!

A friend from a completely different life mailed me.

It's raining!

And that's really all it takes.

Mostly sane & almost happy...

Hyderabad has it going on!
Mithali Raj became the captain of the Indian women's cricket team. The World Cup in South Africa'll be amazing to watch, I think. We're the favourites, even though we lost to those crazy Aussies. It's being played from March 22nd. Don't forget to cheer!
Sania is just incredible! 77th in the world, the WORLD. Fantastic really.
WOMAN POWER baby!
The Hyderabad Sultans won. Yeah, I still have the PHL hangover. We watched the finals, all dressed up in PHL gear, screaming like we were possessed or something. Watching Inderjeet Singh and Sohail Abbas in action, you honestly can't help it. You should see the way they lift the team's spirit just by giving it their all. V.V.S.Laxman is still at the crease. He is humility personified. Saw Walk the Talk and yeah, he was kinda diplomatic on most of the controversial ones but he really has this cool, composed thing about him. Very endearing.

Raj finally emailed me our New Year snaps. Who cares about being photogenic? I looked like I was having a good time and that's all that counts. Best part is, I did.
New Year's eve was amazing. We were at this place called Odyssey in Gurgaon. I had a blast! I wasn't too excited about being away from Sunith but then, the Tsunami happened and we had to cancel our Andamans plan and go up North. On the 1st of January, we left for Shimla. It is such an overhyped place(like most hill stations and places and movies and people I know!). To top that, it didn't even snow and we were really looking forward to it. We then went to Manali by road. It's stunning. I'd love to describe it but seriously, words aren't enough. Pure paradise!
Best part - It snowed! We went to Solan Valley and went skiing. I really didn't feel very pretty falling on my a** everytime I tried to do a little more than what the instructor told us to. Screw gravity! By the second day, my skiing actually improved. I thought it'd be easier than skating. I mean here we even have skis to support us, right? Wrong! It's much tougher, much more painful and hardly effortless. Skiing has a sweet spot too by the way. The instructor(contrary to what we read in novels, this guy wasn't anything close to cute) even told us how to find it. I did. But the idiot told me this great piece of information on the second day when most of my body was sore and bruised! Once we find the spot, skiing's a breeze. One more thing I absolutely rock at!
We saw some army barracks on NH-1 against those towering snow-clad mountains. We weren't allowed to take photographs around that area and the Rohtang pass was closed because of heavy snowfall. That was disappointing but I can never forget those army trucks and that barbed wire around the place. I know it doesn't sound like it was picturesque or romantic or anything. But there's something just divine about these people who protect us. I don't care about the army officers who took advantage of some women in Manipur. What they did is terrible and they're paying for it. Bottomline is, I almost worship these people who work for the armed forces. What they're sacrificing, just to make sure that I continue doing the usual BS without any kind of disruption, is definitely worship-worthy.

I've been feeling really hopeless about things lately.
Tomorrow, Shibu Soren will have to prove his majority. He definitely(thankfully) has the odds against him. He is a criminal, a fugitive who later turned himself in, went on to become a Union Minister, and then quit by sending a fax message from a post office and is now the Chief Minister of Jharkand. Yeah well, shit happens. Tomorrow we'll find out if there's something called justice.
Read somewhere about a meet in Madrid on Democracy, Security and Terrorism. There was a great deal of criticism about the military tactics adopted by the U.S. and how the U.N. should play a more pro-active role. Sure, there are meetings and conferences and seminars. Are these voices even heard? That's what I want to know. If there isn't a Rice or a Bush involved, does the U.N. really listen?
Sachin Tendulkar lost his wicket when he was on 94. I'm not a fan but Gavaskar really doesn't deserve having that record under his name. Dravid made 50-something runs. I was in College attending a seminar and didn't get to watch him. :(

We had an Entrepreneurship Development seminar in College today. Bloody MCP had the ba**s to say "You should select a project like you would select your husband". Some girls actually found that funny. I was offended. I mean, we were there in the first place, obviously because we aspired to something beyond that. As if there are girls today who even consider marriage as a career option. These are the people who should have a shoot at sight order against their name.
Something led to a Microsoft v/s Linux debate. Things were going nowhere and the guy wanted to start discussing some real issues and this girl actually asks, "So what is the answer?" Stupid exam mentality. But then later, her friend told me it was just to irritate that guy. I don't think it worked 'cos he kept smiling. Cant get my mind off his huge teeth and his condescending attitude.
God just makes my world so beautiful!

Talking of Her, I went to the temple on the way to my CAT class yesterday, wearing a pair of jeans and a red(yes, red)t-shirt. The pujari who usually gives me a welcoming smile, gave me a slightly disapproving look. I don't know if it was just my grandmother in my head(How can you go to the temple wearing jeans? It's plain sacrilegious!) or if he actually did. Bah what problems I have!

Long time since I fought with Nits. Not counting those "why the hell did you look at that girl/guy" arguments, because they're really stupid. Long time since I've had a what-else conversation with Raha. Long time since my parents found me almost impossible to tolerate. Long time since I've been kinda blue.

Always an optimistic end. It's true. Writing is therapeutic.

"Love is in the air...and so is pollution!"

What kind of a girlfriend am I? I'm not sentimental. Valentine's day makes me laugh. I mean, even the corny "For us, everyday is Valentine's Day" thing doesn't move me. I don't have a favourite love song. Last night I read this mail, one of those 'love quotes' mail which Rahul must've sent, just to get me into that sappy mood. Some of them were unbelievably sad. Like "Death cannot stop true love; it can only delay it for a little while." I mean when you're about to die, I definitely think you'll have bigger worries than that. I deleted all the crappy "I love you, not only for what you are, But for what I am when I am with you." What is that??
Anyway that mail worked for about 5 hours, I guess, and here's the reason why.

My personal favourite---
"Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.

Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two."
--Captain Corelli's Mandolin

"A kiss is a lovely trick, designed by nature, to stop words when speech becomes superfluous."
--Ingrid Bergmen

"... See there's this place in me where your fingerprints still rest, your kisses still linger, and your whispers softly echo. It's the place where a part of you will forever be a part of me."
--Gretchen Kemp

"Love is but the discovery of ourselves in others, and the delight in the recognition."
--Alexander Smith

"The soul that can speak with its eyes can also kiss with a gaze."
--Unknown

"The most powerful symptom of love is a tenderness which becomes at times almost insupportable."
--Victor Hugo

"Love is the emblem of eternity: it confounds all notion of time: effaces all memory of a beginning, all fear of an end."
--Germaine De Stael

"The most eloquent silence; that of two mouths meeting in a kiss."
--Unknown

"Love is like a friendship caught on fire."
--Bruce Lee

HAPPY VALENTINE'S WEEKEND everyone.(Whatever that is!! hahaha)
{There! I deleted most of it okay?? :)}

Tonight, I am...

Contrary to popular belief, Hyderabad is a very happening place.

So we don't have an Indo-Pak match this month but anyway Vizag isn't too far. Frankly, who wants to watch India lose, again? Better than that, we have the PHL. Yeah, the Sultans are still on top. With Sohail Abbas on our team, as if you can even expect anything else. Martina Navratilova's here! She has around 167 titles to her name. 167!! She's almost 50 and she's so amazingly fit. What determination! What an awesome woman! Jelena Dokic and Tamarine Tanasugarn(hope I spelt that right) lost today. They were the big names of this tournament. A little hopeless already. Last year Mary Pierce was here. She kept raving about everything Hyderabadi. Why isn't she here now? I demand an explanation.
We, the biryani-worshipping, mostly lazy Hyderabadis, are actually becoming culturally aware. The Govt. organized a really cool 'Cultural Bonanza' at Taramati. They got the likes of Hema Malini and Nandita Das to participate. I read about it in the papers too. Hey, I'm busy with College and GRE. I have a very good excuse for not going. What's yours? Okay, I'm in a confrontational mood today. And like I always say(and as though you have a choice!), just take it. There was an Italian film festival at Sarathi Studios and CIEFL. I finally got to watch Cinema Paradiso. I had gotten such overwhelmingly "you better watch it" reviews for that one, I just couldn't miss it. Till that day, I had this myopic view of a pizza-eating, Joey Tribbiani-ish mafia don in my head if anybody said anything about Italians. Honestly, it was beyond my expectations.

Life is now, officially, beautiful. I'm listening to these fantastic songs by ADF. These people are talented. Change is such a great(I've already used the words amazing and awesome)song! Anyway, I was looking for some music on the net. Check this out.

Moving headlights shining through the rain
Neon diamonds light the streets again
Songs of Freedom written on the wall
Words of Heroes spoken as they fall

You’re telling me the same old story
On and on and on
You’re never going to learn to stand up on your own

I gave you everything you said you wanted more
Love lies broken, I’ve heard it all before
Good intentions are all the same to me
Frozen rivers never reach the sea

It's called Frozen Rivers. Incredible song na!
I'm copy pasting lyrics instead of telling you about the beauty of my life and all that blah. So here goes. And this time, I'm making sure that life's not going to catch me unprepared and give me a royal kick in the a**.

Anyway, I wrote my internal exams quite well. I realized that I have this unbelievable predicting-the-questions instinct. It worked wonders. Yes, I have other talents besides talking about Rahul Dravid for hours. Man, I should stop ogling at that strategically placed 'Ruud Rules' poster and start becoming seriously interested in Electronic(s?) Measurement and Instrumentation. I have my end sems in a couple of months and all I know about Sechiverdhan's subject is the name and I'm not so sure about that either. I have my CAT classes thrice a week now. Yeah, one more day of tolerating their unintelligence. I mean why do they even try?
All my regular gymming, ensuring that I'm nowhere in the 1 km radius of Pizza Hut and a 700 calories a day diet have finally paid off.(I haven't had pizza, hot delicious pizza for more than 3 weeks now!). I made an appearance(yeah I feel like a celebrity) at one of those boring gimme-your-best-fake-smile Whisper Valley parties. It was alright. I mean how can you not have fun when everyone's telling you how gorgeous you look? I did lose most of my holiday weight but I'm sure none of them knew about the magical slimming effect of black.
I watched Raincoat again last weekend. It is such a fabulous movie! Aish finally ditched her plastic expression and that irritating giggle for something close to good acting and Ajay Devgan, as usual, is beyond criticism. It's unbelievable how Rituparno Ghosh actually weaved this amazing story around a raincoat. Black, that over-hyped movie, will definitely be a let down, I think. Even in Khamoshi, everybody was shouting all over the place and in parts, it was way over the top.

I can't remember the last time I was driving down the perfect roads of Hyderabad after 10pm. It finally happened last week. We went to my friend's farm about 20 km away from the city. It was grrrrreat! We danced. Mayur actually had this make-shift floor by the pool and an amazing collection. He played That Thing You Do(I love dancing to that song!) atleast 5 times. After that, the crazy and sloshed went for a midnight swim, and the sane and sensible(the next day was a working day!) played Pictionary. I swear I never knew it was such a fun game. (Sorry to disappoint you, but I'm in the Sanity Unleashed(now where'd I read this?) category. Usually I'm a little competitive(huge understatement!) but that day I didn't hit the supersonic decibel-level even though Pranav(genius that he is) drew 4 squares, one on top of the other with a line down the centre, and expected us to guess the word 'elevator' from that. I mean, come on!!!

Oh man, now that A M song, Ironic is playing. Okay, I'm fighting the urge to copy paste the lyrics here. You have to listen to it. Go do that right now. Good night. :)

Music Is My Refuge. I Could Crawl Into The Spaces Between The Notes And Curl My Back To Loneliness.

For Your Eyes Only (In verse)

I have no words to say,
let alone write.
That deep expression
lies buried somewhere beneath
all this confusion and chaos.

Dear,
And no further.
Fullstops in place of commas,
unsaid words in a pregnant pause,
creating a void,
so full of emptiness,
Distressing, Frustrating.

More to come, that's waiting in the wings,
more beyond the "How are yous"
Something yearning to be said
but lost in this melee
of unimportant, unnecessary words.

Awkward pauses, raising question marks and
eyebrows
Then exclamations and more fullstops.
Before everything boils down to
the final, hypocritical "yours truly"

What else about writing this letter?
Pleasantaries, exaggerated expressions,
etceteras and so-ons,
that block out the true emotions from surfacing
and it goes unsaid.
Ignored, yet again?

"Yours Truly..."
Is it all over now?
Unsaid remain those ever crucial words...
I wonder if this effort was worthwhile,
This letter-writing fiasco,
this failure of expression.
Now its all but over,
right down to the last fullstop.
But-
I feel the need for an afterthought,
The need for that final grab at freedom,
And so:
"P.S. Goodbye";
Because the best always comes last.

Reality continues to ruin my life

I'm not perfect.

God, it was hard to type that with a straight face. Still, every year I devote my energies to being a better daughter, student, sister, friend, and strive towards becoming "a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma". And 2005 will be no exception. So, without further senti-maaroing(a more fashionable word than ado), and mostly because I hate writing introductory paragraphs, my resolutions for 2005.

2005 RESOLUTIONS I INTEND TO KEEP
(I know we're already halfway through January but...do you even need an explanation??)

This is in no specific order.

1. Make sure there's always someone to blame when I dont complete something on time.(Say goodbye to on-the-spot, I-can-see-you-made-that-up excuses).

2. Don't go by some plan. Procrastinate more.(I'm too lazy to do even that!).

3. Embrace lack of impulse control.(Buy those mindnumbingly expensive red shoes, wear them once and forget you even own them!).

4. I will make the PHL big news. Not just for me, for all the Indians who are sick of seeing Indian sports news consist entirely of Tendla, Veeru, Tendla, Veeru, Saurav, Tendla, Veeru, Rahul(oh I said it!), and Tendla.

5. Fill up all 20GB on the iPod. (First, convince dad that an iPod is the primary requisite for painfree living).

6. Never go on a diet. (Crib about the fluctuating figures on the scale and readily agree with Sunith when he says that I am a beautiful angel! No one ever said that angels were supposed to be anorexic).

7. Be a disappointment to my parents. (Need I elaborate?)

8. Abandon my addiction to moderation. From now on, it's all or nothing.(Okay we know it's going to be mostly nothing).

9. Make fun of Irfan Pathan at least once a week (just to irritate my sister).

10. Complain about the weather as if there was something anyone could do about it (and accuse the temperamental Weather Gods for all my mood swings).

11. My pious alter ego and her resolutions--
2002> I will go to the temple every Friday.
2003> I will go to the temple as often as possible.
2004> I will set aside time each day for prayer and meditation.
2005> I will try to catch the early morning sermons on TV.

Happy New Year, everybody.

{Inspired by Calvin, Kerry(yes, your NY resolutions email did make a difference!) and as always, Ras}.

Sultans Of Swing

I was at the inaugaral match of the PHL at the Gachibowli stadium yesterday. Now, dont tell me you dont know what that is! Okay, for the uninitiated, PHL is the Premier Hockey League. There are different teams with very interesting names. Some of them are Delhi Dazzlers(okay suuuure!), Bangalore HiFliers(Oh please!), Chennai Veerans(Ahaan??!!??), Sher-E-Jalandhar(Ummmm whatever!) and the Hyderabad Sultans(wow! :))

Obviously we won, 1-0. The Lions were tamed. Hockey's really exciting! It is much better than football and much quicker than cricket. Oh and we have Dilip Tirkey and that Pakistani dude Sohail Abbas(who couldn't play yesterday due to some injury). The players are actually quite cute. Gagan Ajit Singh was cool. Sameer Dad scored the matchwinning goal and how we cheered him on! We were 9 of us, all wearing blue. Yeah, the Sultans are our new Men In Blue!(atleast till Feb when Dravid and gang take on the Pakis). Anyway my final verdict: Hockey rules!

tears are not enough

What can I say that hasn't already been said or read about the Tsunami tragedy?

I have no personal poignant story to narrate. All my relatives in Chennai and Kerala are shaken but fine.
I did party on New Year's Eve. I spent more than I should on my New Year clothes, shoes and jewellery. On January 1st, I woke up to more images of the tsunami-striken areas. I switched off the television and went down to the hotel's restaurant for my breakfast.
And my life goes on.

I have done my bit. I contributed money online this morning. That was more a justification to myself than to you. It's just not enough. There is a cloud of grief everywhere and I have my own selfish issues as usual. I dont know what I should do to make my world happier. All these people who are homeless, with their tremendous will to survive, are such an inspiration really. There are stories everywhere. The one about the family who tied themselves up to a tree to be able to fight the raging waters, another about the people in the coastal areas rebuilding their lives from scratch, children, teenagers, everyone is doing everything they can. All I do each day is go through my mechanical life with my usual emotional insecurities.

I was supposed to go to the Andamans on the 25th. The plan was to fly to Chennai and then, from there, to Port Blair. I am happy we postponed it to Monday(27th). Our tickets to Port Blair for the 25th weren't confirmed and we didn't want to take the risk. I was the only one who was against the idea but now I'm glad all my cousins didn't really listen.
That was the 4th trip in 2004 that got cancelled and the 2nd time I thought God had given me another chance at life. Now, what did I do to deserve that?

For the world, in general, 2004 wasn't a very good year. Okay, now that's an understatement. There have been numerous top ten stories in all the news channels and newspapers so I'm not going to go into what went wrong. Obviously you know what the world's been through in the last 12 months. India, in particular, had her own share of tragedies, calamities and strife.
Personally, 2004 was wonderful. Academically, Physically, Romantically etc.

I have reason to celebrate and according to me, the world does too. 2005 can be a new beginning. I'm not saying we should forget the staggering number of people who died. I believe that we need to fight this growing sadness and be proactive. A new year puts everything in perspective. Is this too practical and heartless?
All those advertisements on television with the names and phone numbers of the people who are missing, all the images we see in the news of people trying to rebuild their lives are there to remind us that beyond everything, there is hope.
I want to hold on to the hope that the future is bright for our world, our country and for every person who has the will and the gumption to fight against all odds and for every person who has that primal need to survive with blind faith.